Questions:
1. A man wanted to enter an exclusive club but did not know the password that was required. He waited by the door and listened. A club member knocked on the door and the doorman said, “twelve.” The member replied, “six ” and was let in. A second member came to the door and the doorman said, “six.” The member replied, “three” and was let in. The man thought he had heard enough and walked up to the door. The doorman said ,”ten” and the man replied, “five.” But he was not let in.
What should have he said?

2. Hildegarde was taken to the dungeon and presented with two doors, each protected by a single guard. One door led to freedom and the other door to a hungry lion. Hildegarde was allowed to ask one question of one guard of her choice. The question was limited to a yes/no answer. Hildegarde knew that this was a tricky pair of guards: one would always lie and the other would always tell the truth. The guards knew behind which door lay freedom and which door led to the lions, and knew who was the liar and who was the truth sayer. But how was Hildegarde to know the difference? Hildegarde devised a way and went happily on her way. What was the question?

3. A man was found dead in his study. He was slumped over his desk and a gun was in his hand. There was a cassette recorder on his desk. When the police entered the room and pressed the play button on the tape recorder they heard: “I can’t go on. I have nothing to live for.” Then there was the sound of a gunshot. How did the detective immediately know that the man had been murdered and it wasn’t a suicide? Read the rest of this entry »

At age 4 success is . . . . Not piddling in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . Having friends.
At age 17 success is . . Having a driver’s license.
At age 35 success is . . . ..having money.
At age 50 success is . . . Having money..
At age 70 success is . .. . Having a drivers license.
At age 75 success is . … . Having friends.
At age 80 success is . . .. Not piddling in your pants.

Pass this on to someone who could use a laugh.

Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way;
BUT NEVER forget the blessings that come each day.

1. Never give me work in the morning. Always wait until 4:00pm and then bring it to me. The challenge of a deadline is refreshing.

2. If it’s really a “rush job”, run in and interrupt me every 10 minutes to inquire how it’s going. That helps. Or even better, hover behind me, advising me at every keystroke.

3. Always leave without telling anyone where you’re going. It gives me a chance to be creative when someone asks where you are.

4. Wait until my yearly review and THEN tell me what my goals SHOULD have been. Give me a mediocre performance rating with a cost of living increase. I’m not here for the money anyway.

5. If you give me more than one job to do, don’t tell me which is the priority. I like being a psychic.

6. Do your best to keep me late. I adore this office and really have nowhere to go or anything to do. I have no life beyond work.

7. If a job I do pleases you, keep it a secret. If that gets out, it could mean a promotion.

8. If you don’t like my work, tell everyone. I like my name to be popular in conversations.
I was born to be whipped.

9. If you have special instructions for a job, don’t write them down. In fact, save them until the job is almost done. No use confusing me with useful information.

10. Never introduce me to the people you’re with. I have no right to know anything. In the corporate food chain, I am plankton. When you refer to them later, my shrewd deductions will identify them.

11. Tell me all your little problems. No one else has any and it’s nice to know someone is less fortunate. I especially like the story about having to pay so much taxes on the bonus check you received for being such a good manager.

Questions:

1. What is as big as you are and yet does not weigh anything?

2.Two cannibals were chatting as they had their dinner. One complained that he really quite disliked his new mother-in-law. What was the advice given to him by his companion?

3. Paul’s height is six feet, he’s an assistant at a butcher’s shop, and wears size 9 shoes. What does he weigh?

4. What types of words are these: Madam, civic, eye, level.

5. What ends everything always?

6. When you have me, you feel like sharing me. But, if you do share me, you don’t have me. What am I?

7. A cowboy rode into town on Friday, stayed three days, and rode out again on Friday. How did he do that?

8. The person who makes it has no need for it. The person who purchases it does not use it. The person who does use it does not know he or she is. What is it?

9. It is an insect, and the first part of its name is the name of another insect. What is it?

10. 2 fathers and 2 sons go fishing. Each of them catches one fish. So why do they bring home only 3 fishes?

11. Which is the longest word in English?

12. You can hold it without using your hands or arms. What is it?

13. What do the letter ‘t’ and an island have in common?

14. Which is the word in English that has nine letters, and remains a word at each step even when you remove one letter from it, right up to a single letter remaining. List each letter as you remove them, along with the resulting word at each step.

15. Complete this sequence of letters: o, t, t, f, f, s, s, _, _, _. Read the rest of this entry »

The one place where a flag flies all day, never goes up or comes down, and does not get saluted, is the moon.

All the planets in the solar system rotate anticlockwise, except Venus. It is the only planet that rotates clockwise.

Earth is the densest planet in the solar system and the only one not named after a god.

Earth orbits the sun at an average speed of 29.79 km/s (18.51 miles/sec), or about 107 000 km/h (about 67,000 miles/hour).

The sun is 330,330 times larger than the earth.

Earth is slowing down — in a few million years there won’t be a leap year.

The tail of the Great Comet of 1843 was 330 million km long. (It will return in 2356.) Summer on Uranus lasts for 21 years — but so does winter.

Planets, meaning wanderers, are named after Roman deities: Mercury, messenger of the gods; Venus, the god of love and beauty; Mars, the god of war; Jupiter, king of the gods; and Saturn, father of Jupiter and god of agriculture; Neptune, god of the sea. Read the rest of this entry »

Everyone can take steps to improve their memory, and with time and practice most people can gain the ability to memorize seemingly impossible amounts of information. Whether you want to win the World Memory Championships, ace your history test, or simply remember where you put your keys, this article can get you started. Scientists believe that exercising your brain can create a ‘cognitive reserve’ that will help you stay sharp as you age.

1. Convince yourself that you do have a good memory that will improve. Too many people get stuck here and convince themselves that their memory is bad, that they are just not good with names, that numbers just slip out of their minds for some reason. Erase those thoughts and vow to improve your memory. Commit yourself to the task and bask in your achievements — it’s hard to keep motivated if you beat yourself down every time you make a little bit of progress.

2. Keep your brain active. The brain is not a muscle, but regularly “exercising” the brain actually does keep it growing and spurs the development of new nerve connections that can help improve memory. By developing new mental skills—especially complex ones such as learning a new language or learning to play a new musical instrument—and challenging your brain with puzzles and games you can keep your brain active and improve its physiological functioning.

3. Exercise daily. Regular aerobic exercise improves circulation and efficiency throughout the body, including in the brain, and can help ward off the memory loss that comes with aging. Exercise also makes you more alert and relaxed, and can thereby improve your memory uptake, allowing you to take better mental “pictures.” Read the rest of this entry »

1. A bad beginning makes a bad ending.
2. A bad corn promise is better than a good lawsuit.
3. A bad workman quarrels with his tools.
4. A bargain is a bargain.
5. A beggar can never be bankrupt.
6. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
7. A bird may be known by its song.
8. A black hen lays a white egg.
9. A blind leader of the blind.
10. A blind man would be glad to see.
11. A broken friendship may be soldered, but will never be sound.
12. A burden of one’s own choice is not felt.
13. A burnt child dreads the fire.
14. A cat in gloves catches no mice.
15. A city that parleys is half gotten.
16. A civil denial is better than a rude grant.
17. A clean fast is better than a dirty breakfast.
18. A clean hand wants no washing.
19. A clear conscience laughs at false accusations.
20. A close mouth catches no flies.
21. A cock is valiant on his own dunghill.
22. A cracked bell can never sound well.
23. A creaking door hangs long on its hinges.
24. A curst cow has short horns.
25. A danger foreseen is half avoided.
26. A drop in the bucket.
27. A drowning man will catch at a straw.
28. A fair face may hide a foul heart.
29. A fault confessed is half redressed.
30. A fly in the ointment.
31. A fool always rushes to the fore.
32. A fool and his money are soon parted.
33. A fool at forty is a fool indeed.
34. A fool may ask more questions in an hour than a wise man can answer in seven years.
35. A fool may throw a stone into a well which a hundred wise men cannot pull out.
36. A fool’s tongue runs before his wit.
37. A forced kindness deserves no thanks.
38. A foul morn may turn to a fair day.
39. A fox is not taken twice in the same snare.
40. A friend in need is a friend indeed.
43. A friend is never known till needed.
42. A friend to all is a friend to none.
43. A friend’s frown is better than a foe’s smile.
44. A good anvil does not fear the hammer.
45. A good beginning is half the battle.
46. A good beginning makes a good ending.
47. A good deed is never lost.
48. A good dog deserves a good bone.
49. A good example is the best sermon.
50. A good face is a letter of recommendation. Read the rest of this entry »

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Adventures of Billy and Stevie

Adventures of Billy and Stevie

Read the rest of this entry »

Health:
1. Drink plenty of water.
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants, and eat less food that is manufactured in plants (factory).
4. Live with the 3 E’s — Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
5. Make Time for Prayers.
6. Play more games.
7. Read more books than you did in 2009.
8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day & meditate/pray.
9. Sleep for 7 hours.
10. Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day — and while you walk, SMILE !!

Personality:
11. Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
12. Don’t have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13. Don’t overdo; keep your limits.
14. Don’t take yourself so seriously; no one else does.
15. Don’t waste your precious energy on gossip.
16. Dream more while you are awake.
17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need..
18. Forget issues of the past. Don’t remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don’t hate others.
20. Make peace with your past so it won’t spoil the present.
21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
22. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
23. Smile and Laugh more often.
24. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree. Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Sir,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m writing you, but I’m leaving the job. The offer was too lucrative and attractive for me to turn down. I had to abscond because I wanted to avoid a scene with the HR and you. I am sorry but I had no choice. TaTa – Bye Bye…

The project is working fine. There are only 108 issues pending, out of which only 38% issues are High Priority. Hence I am sure there is no need to worry about. The next Phase of major enhancements I have been working upon, have been completed halfway. I am sure the new person who would replace me would not understand what all I had done so far. Hence, for his and your convenience, I have taken care to remove all the work that I had been doing this far for nearly 3 months now. I am sure you will appreciate my insight and “big heart”. A great gesture…

Also, I have changed my contact number. So you will not be able to get in touch with me, to congratulate me. But I know your blessings are always with me. Last but not the least, I also have the Rs. 12000 entrusted to me by our company’s cultural events group, for the upcoming movie event. I am sure you would have wanted me to keep it with myself as an added bonus from our company. I respect you very much, hence your wish is my command. Bless me always… Read the rest of this entry »