During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question. She said, ” How do I know if I married the right person ?”

I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said, ” It Depends. Is that your husband?”

In all seriousness, she answered ” How do you know?”

Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it’s Weighing on your mind.

Here’s the answer.

EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with Your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked Their idiosyncrasies.

Falling in love with your spouse wasn’t hard. In fact, it was a Completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn’t have to DO anything. That’s why it’s called “falling” in love… Because
it’s happening TO YOU.

People in love sometimes say, ” I was swept of my feet.” Think about the Imagery of that _expression. It implies that you were just standing There; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is easy. It’s a passive and spontaneous experience.

But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades. It’s the Natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls Become a bother ( if they come at all), touch is not always welcome ( when it happens), and your spouse’s idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute,  drive you nuts.

The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you Think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, ” Did I marry The right person?” And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of The love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else.

This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for  their Unhappiness and look
outside their marriage for fulfillment.

Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is The most obvious. But  sometimes people turn to work, church, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.
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3 Easy Ways to Die :
Take a Cigar daily – You will die 10 years early.
Drink Rum daily – You will die 30 years early.
Love Someone Truly – You will die daily.

1. A foolish man tells a woman to STOP talking, but a WISE man tells her that she looks extremely BEAUTIFUL when her LIPS are CLOSED.

2. Three FASTEST means of Communication :
1. Tele-Phone
2. Tele-Vision
3. Tell to Woman
Need still FASTER – Tell her NOT to tell ANYONE.

3. Love your friends not their sisters. Love your sisters not their friends.

4. A man got 2 wishes from GOD. He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman..
Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him.
Moral : BE SPECIFIC

5. Let us be generous like this : Four Ants are moving through a forest.
They see an ELEPHANT coming towards them.
Ant 1 says : we should KILL him.
Ant 2 says : No, Let us break his Leg alone.
Ant 3 says : No, we will just throw him away from our path.
Ant 4 says : No, we will LEAVE him because he is ALONE and we are FOUR.

6. If you do NOT have a Girl Friend – You are missing SOME thing in your life.
If you HAVE a Girl Friend – You are missing EVERY thing in your life.

7. Question : When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE.
Answer : On their MARRIAGE.

8. When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY GOD and ask him to free you from Darkness.
Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness – Please PAY the ELECTRICITY BILL.

Learn to be there for each other.

A marriage that is made up of both elements. The committment that is made on that auspicious occasion for both the husband and wife and not just one or the other.  The efforts that should come from both sides to make things work. To make a marriage successful and everlasting.

Differences, disputes, misunderstandings and misconceptions should always be ironed out right from the beginning and always before matters become worse day by day. It’s always better to speak one’s mind and say what he/she is feeling before allowing that inner volcano to erupt. A spouse should not feel hesitant or fearful to say what he/she is feeling. Neither one should be thinking to oneself at any time during their marriage that “ If I were to say this or that, then all hell may break loose “. If a husband and wife cannot openly communicate well with one another then what’s the point. If a husband and wife cannot understand each other then what’s the point, right? They should be able to have not only a husband and wife relationship but also a strong friendship in which kindness, love, sensitivity, trust, loyalty, mutual respect, honesty and compromise be of utmost importance.

It takes two individuals to build a bond that strengthens over time if nutured well and given a lot of attention, caring and love. Just like a plant that needs water and sunlight so that its roots can become strong and it can grow into a healthy plant. If it is ignored for too long, then it will surely lose its stability and eventually wilt and die.

The same concept applies to not only a marriage but to build and hold onto a strong friendship. The foundation has to have stability for it to nurture into something worthwhile, longlasting and beautiful.

Just like anything in life, everything requires time, consistency and patience before the results may be noticeably visible. No success may be ours overnight and it is this exact patience, time and consistency which is being ignored nowadays and leading to destruction. The level of tolerance for one another has been seen diminishing and becoming almost extinct nowadays.

Either it’s the wife that is making the wholehearted effort or the husband. It’s unfortunate but the truth is that it is rare that it may be in balance from both ends. Either one is willing to compromise as opposed to the other. However, I feel that the weight always needs to be pulled from both sides. But it’s a shame that nowadays it’s truly not evident that this is happening. Many of the times, it is the woman who is trying to keep things together. Making any and every possible effort to keep the home and family from breaking down. It takes way too many years to build an honest and trustworthy relationship but only a few mere words to end it all off. That is always the easiest part to bring everything to an end but to start a married life all over again takes so much energy and mental capacity to be able to bring oneself into that frame of mind once again. Not easy to do at all. Sometimes perhaps not men as much, but women decide not to settle down again for many years because they have been so drained mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically that they cannot see themselves going through the whole melodrama all over again.
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A lawyer, a doctor and a physician are discussing on this topic: “Is it better to have a wife or a mistress ?”

The doctor:” A wife is better than a mistress.When married, you feel comfortable, and you suffer no stress.”

The lawyer: “A mistress is better anyway.If you’re married, in case of divorce, you’ll have to face to several legal problems.”

The Mathematician: “The best solution is to have both.So when your mistress thinks you’re at home with ur wife, while your wife thinks you’re at home with ur mistress, you ‘re free to do maths.
   

What is “pi”?
- Mathematician : “Pi is the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its diameter.”
- Engineer : “Pi is about 22/7.”
- Physicist : “Pi is 3.14159 plus or minus 0.000005″
- Computer Programmer : “Pi is 3.141592653589 in double precision.”
- Nutritionist : “You’re one track math-minded fellows, Pie is a healthy and delicious dessert!”
  : D 

A mathematician, a biologist and a physicist are sitting in a street cafe watching people going in and coming out of the house on the other side of the street.
First they see two people going into the house. Time passes. After a while they notice three persons coming out of the house.
- The physicist : “The measurement wasn’t accurate.”
- The biologists : “They have reproduced”.
- The mathematician : “If now exactly one person enters the house then it will be empty again.”

Two mathematicians are in a bar. The first one says to the second that the average person knows
very little about basic mathematics. The second one disagrees, and claims that most people can cope with a reasonable amount of math.

The first mathematician goes off to the washroom, and in his absence the second calls over the
waitress. He tells her that in a few minutes, after his friend has returned, he will call her over and
ask her a question. All she has to do is answer “one third x cubed.”
She repeats “one thir — dex cue”?
He repeats “one third x cubed”.
She asks, “one thir dex cuebd?”
“Yes, that’s right,” he says.
So she agrees, and goes off mumbling to herself, “one thir dex cuebd…”.

The first guy returns and the second proposes a bet to prove his point, that most people do know
something about basic math. He says he will ask the blonde waitress an integral, and the first
laughingly agrees. The second man calls over the waitress and asks “what is the integral of x
squared?”.

The waitress says “one third x cubed” and while walking away, turns back and says over her
shoulder “plus a constant!”
   

-In theory, there’s no difference between theory and practice.
In practice, yes there is… Shocked

-Theory is when you know all the process, but nothing works.
-Practice is when everything runs properly, but don’t know why.
-In Computer’s science, when we mix theory and practice, nothing works and we don’t know why..
   

A quantum mechanic student is someone who’s half-blind, and is looking after a cat which probably doesn’t exists in black room
   

Three statisticians engineers are training themselves at gun shotting on a target.The first guy missed the target, the the bullet went very closed by, and hit the target by its left.The second guy missed also the target but the bullet were a little at the right of the target.
The third one shouted then:
-No worth to shot then! We meanly got it!
   
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Realize that your wife is a special person, and the most special person in your life. In my case my wife moved half way across the world to be with me.. The first step to appreciating your wife is to realize that they made sacrifices for you, and you need to let them know that you appreciate this. You can never say “I love you” enough, and when your wife does something to enhance your life, let them know that you really appreciate it.

Wedding Rings
Never take your wife fore-granted. When you got married, you made a commitment to love and cherish this women. Even if you are upset or frustrated at them, remember that fighting gets you nowhere.. If you take your wife fore-granted, then you are bound to overlook all the special things she does for you on a daily basis.

Roses
If you have children, then you really need to take some extra time to pamper your wife. It could be a massage, bringing home her favorite dinner. Surprise her with a bouquet of flowers or roses.

My little angel
If you have children, make sure that you thank her for being the mother of your children. She carried your baby in her belly for nine months, the majority of the time it was painful and very difficult. As a husband, we get of easy, make sure you tell your wife what a great mother she is. You also should tell her how lucky you are to have such a wonderful wife and child.

If she is a stay at home mom, that does not mean she is “unemployed” she has a full time job that you can never call in sick. It is a 24 hour a day job, so do your best to help out. When you get home from work, help out. This is your baby too.

If you slip up and have a fight, make sure you say sorry. There is an unwritten rule in marriage. Your wife might not always be right, but she is never wrong. Be the first to say sorry, and don’t hesitate. After all, it takes two people to fight, and you should be a man and apologize for fighting, as at the minimum you are guilty of engaging in a fight.

If you apologize with sincerity, and really mean it, it will end most quarrels quickly. If you started it, then you should make it up to her with a nice dinner.By following the five steps above, your marriage will be better, you will be happier, and everyone will be on the same team. Follow these steps for a month, and get back to me. You will notice your marriage is better, your wife is happier, and you will be happier.

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
David Bissonette

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can’t face each other, but still they stay together.
Sacha Guitry

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.
Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
Anonymous

The great question …. which I have not been able to answer …. is, ‘What does a woman want?
Dumas

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
Sigmund Freud

‘Some people ask the secret of our long marriage.  We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week.  A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing.  She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.’
Anonymous

‘There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking.  It’s called marriage.’
Sam Kinison

‘I’ve had bad luck with both my wives.  The first one left me, and the second one didn’t.’
James Holt McGavra

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you’re wrong, admit it,
2.. Whenever you’re right, shut up.
Patrick Murra

The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once….
Nash

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
Anonymous

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
Henny Youngman

A good wife always forgives her husband when she’s wrong.
Rodney Dangerfield

A man inserted an ‘ad’ in the classifieds:  ‘Wife wanted’. Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: ‘You can have mine.’
Anonymous

First Guy (proudly): ‘My wife’s an angel!’
Second Guy: ‘You’re lucky, mine’s still alive.’

*”5 Reasons Couples Fight and Breakup and What you Can Do About It”*

Nearly everyone has experienced a relationship breakup or divorce and it canbe one of the most painful periods in your life as you try to heal your broken heart. What we have discovered in our relationship coaching practice, many breakups don’t have to happen. So, if breakups don’t have to occur, what cases them and how can you prevent them? Here are four ideas to help you better understand why breakups happen and what you can do to prevent them in your relationship.

1. Old Fears Surface.
It’s to be expected that being in an intimate relationship will inevitable bring up fears and challenges from the past. These might include fearing not being good enough, attractive enough, wealthy enough or even feelings of abandonment. If fears are not expected, looked at and healed, they interfere in some way or another with the health of every relationship. Take some time to notice when the fears surface, be loving with yourself but look inward instead of outward blaming your partner for what clearly is your issue.

Ask yourself if your fears are “true” or are you just making “stories” up in your head. If you are creating those “stories” and there’s no basis of truth to them, then change your thinking. It’s not always easy to do and it takes moment by moment monitoring of your thoughts. If you need help and support to make the changes you want in your life, be courageous enough to get it. You may not have healed your broken heart from past relationships that ended and you find it very difficult to trust your current partner or open your heart completely to him or her. We suggest that you stop living from the hurt of those past relationships and bring yourself into the present moment, without continuing the “stories” of the past. Commit to starting over, allowing your fears to be there but reminding yourself that this is a new day.

2. Not Feeling Understood, Valued, Loved and Appreciated.
Everyone wants to feel understood, valued, loved and appreciated and when we’re not, we tend to either withdraw or attack the other person for not meeting our needs. If you want to be appreciated, start appreciating the other people in your life. Sounds simplistic but it really works!

If you are not feeling loved, start being open to seeing and feeling love and appreciation that people are giving you that you may not be aware of in your daily life. It may be that someone allows you to go ahead of them in traffic or tells you to go ahead in a grocery line. Send some appreciation back to them and to everyone around you and watch love snowball in your life.

3. Not Making their Relationship a Priority.
Many couples take each other for granted and don’t give their relationship the attention it needs most of the time. The lack of closeness and connection can be overwhelming and can cause great loneliness. Make your relationship a priority in your life. Set aside time everyday to connect
with your partner.

We believe that sex happens long before the bedroom. It starts all day long when you have thoughts about your partner–Are these thoughts positive or negative? It continues when you come together–Are you happy to see each other and express love and appreciation or do you great each other with a laundry list of chores, things to be done or grievances?

These are just a couple of ways we make our relationship a priority. Try them in yours!
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It is likely no surprise to you that God has wired women and men differently. We all recognize some of these differences, but others often hide in plain sight. Shaunti Feldhahn, a nationally syndicated newspaper columnist, author and speaker recently wrote a fantastic book, For Women Only: What You Need to Know About the Inner Lives of Men. In it, she recounts the surprising truths she learned about men after interviewing more than one thousand of them. Not long ago, I had the opportunity to interview Shaunti for our radio broadcast, HomeWord with Jim Burns. In our discussion, we spoke about ten things guys wish women knew about men. I think you’ll find these ten things fascinating! Even more, I believe that in understanding these issues, you’ll be equipped to lead your marriage to a better place!

1) Men would rather feel unloved than inadequate and disrespected. Husbands need to know that their wives respect them both privately and publicly. Men thrive when they know that their wives trust them, admire them and believe in them. Shaunti Feldhahn’s research indicated that men would rather sense the loss of loving feelings from their wives than to be disrespected by them.

2) A man’s anger is often a response to feeling disrespected by his wife. When a husband becomes angry with his wife, he may not come out and say, “You’re disrespecting me!” But, there is a good likelihood that he is feeling stung by something his wife has done which he considers disrespectful and humiliating.

3) Men are insecure. Men are afraid that they aren’t cutting it in life — not just at work, but at home, in their role as a husband. They may never vocalize this, but inwardly, they are secretly vulnerable. The antidote? Affirmation. To men, affirmation from their wives is everything! If they don’t receive this affirmation from their wives, they’ll seek it elsewhere. When they receive regular and genuine affirmation from their wives (not flattery, by the way), they become much more secure and confident in all areas of their lives.

4) Men feel the burden of being the provider for their family. Intellectually, it doesn’t matter how much or little a man makes, or whether or not his wife makes more or less money in her career. Men simply bear the emotional burden of providing for their family. It’s not a burden they’ve chosen to bear. Men are simply wired with this burden. As such, it is never far from their minds and can result in the feeling of being trapped. While wives cannot release their husbands from this burden, they can relieve it through a healthy dose of appreciation, encouragement and support.

5) Men want more sex. Everyone’s natural response to this is probably, “Duh!” But, that response is probably for the wrong reason. We primarily assume that men want more sex with their wives due to their physical wiring (their “needs”). But, surprisingly, Shaunti Feldhahn’s research showed that the reason men want more sex is because of their strong need to be desired by their wives. Men simply need to be wanted. Regular, fulfilling sex is critical to a man’s sense of feeling loved and desired.

6) Sex means more than sex. When men feel their wives desire them sexually, it has a profound effect on the rest of their lives. It gives them an increasing sense of confidence and well-being that carries over into every other area of his life. The flipside of this coin also carries a profoundly negative affect. When a husband feels rejected sexually, he not only feels his wife is rejecting him physically, but that she is somehow rejecting his life as a husband, provider and man. This is why making sex a priority in marriage is so incredibly important!

7) Men struggle with visual temptation. This means the vast majority of men respond to visual images when it comes to women. And, this doesn’t just mean the guys with wandering eyes. Even the most godly husband cannot avoid noticing a woman who dresses in a way that draws attention to her body. Even if it is just a glance, these visual images are stored away in the male brain as a sort of “visual rolodex” that will reappear without any warning. Men can choose whether to dwell on these images and memories or dismiss them, but they can’t control when these images appear. Read the rest of this entry »

Fisherman
Wife wanted, must be able to dig, clean, cook worms and clean fish. Must have own boat with motor. Please send photograph of motorboat.

Salesman
Once in a lifetime offer, to get yourself the original, genuine article. One of the most handsome and smartest bachelor’s around is now looking for a wife. And you could be the lucky one he chooses! Has own house, car and successful career!

Economist
I am in demand of a wife. Supply is great though my requirements are high. However the Elasticity of my demands should not bear too heavy a burden upon the national interest.

Mathematician
Wife required to complete the formula of my life. Must be numerate and understand complex algebraic logarithms. Needed to help further my family unit.

IT Consultant
Well there is definite room for improvement in my life. The speed of my current flows of information and processes is slowing down and the injection of a wife into my life is bound to improve efficiency. Compatibility could be an issue.

Businessman
Wife wanted for company.

Politician
I feel there is a need in this world, to improve the ways we live, to harmonize the processes of life and to build upon past differences and short comings. I believe that we the people need someone to share our lives. To feel the joys of parent hood, and bear the social responsibilities, as we should in a civilized society…………….. (etc etc and never getting to the point)

Car Dealer
Wanted a sturdy, reliable, low depreciating wife. Should be in excellent working condition.

Farmer
Wanted a wife from good stock. Required for planting flower in my life.

Lawyer
I hereby propose to solicit myself as an eligible candidate for the post of wife after marriage. The person whom I’m looking for should be strictly -a girl. The girl should be strictly a girl, with evidence to support this view that she is a girl. The girl should be willing to surrender to the service and jurisdiction of My Lord i.e. Myself.

Any objections would be overruled and will not be sustained. Apply in limited confidence as all liabilities are null and void in the event of failure on our part of any kind whatsoever.

Pilot
Wife required to complete my life. Please only level headed applicants. She must not have her heads in the clouds, but have her feet firmly on the ground. Her heart must be in it for the long haul. And she absolutely must also be aerodynamically sound!!!

Banker
Wanted wife who takes interest in me and credits me with her service.
Read the rest of this entry »

For those who r Married as well as for those who wil get Married…..

Sharing a few thoughts for Would – be grooms

For Would-Be Grooms:

Rule.No.1 - Never compare your mamma’s cooking with your wife’s! There is no faster way to dig your own grave than that! Please understand that your mom’s cooking has the backing of 20 odd years of experience.. ..don’t expect that from your wife whose hardly into the process! What if she were to compare your earning capacity with her dad’s!!! So shshshhhhh.. ..!!!

Rule.No.2 : Never go out of your way to please the lady with flowers, chocolates and gifts during your engagement period. If ever you do , please follow it up post-wedding too! When you could cover 20kms in 15 minutes when you are engaged just to spend some time with her, how dare you forget her birthday post – marriage, even after you are given the broadest of hints by her! Remember expectations always double…ever heard of them being halved???

Rule.No.3: Do compliment her every now and then, verbally or with gifts! What are those lovely Teddies and Archies gift cards for? Don’t sit there like the Lord Of The Rings expecting to be waited upon! Of course she will do it but everyone likes to be appreciated and pampered!!!!

Rule.No.4: This is very important! Sulking or complaining about marriage being a big mistake is a strict NO -NO!! You got into it with your eyes wide open, brimming with enthusiasm!! No one ever pushed you into it! So why this drama now!

Rule.No.5: Be Brave and take your own decisions and stand up by them!!
Consult your parents for advice but realise that you are grown up enough to lead your life! Respect your partner’s views at all times! Remember she has given up a lot more to make a life with you!!

Sharing thoughts for Would – be Brides. (Don’t know how many will take it in the right sense. But still…)
1. Don’t expect too much from him. Less the expectations lesser the disappointments.

2. Don’t ever dare to plan any outing or movie on a day when there is an interesting cricket match going on. REMEMBER SPORTS <READ CRICKET> is more important to him than anything else. U spoil his day n He spoils yours

3. Over Emotions, Sentiments.. . Woha… What are these? Tears are not going to give any results either. It’s just a temp. attention that you get. No one likes Cry Babies m Whining Wifes.

4. Never dare to cross with his mother.Even if he says “My Mom’s cooking is the best. U are nothing in front of her.” take it easily with a smile. Tell him tht u are learning from his mother and will try to do it better. U are not gonna lose anything!

5. Try to know his friends and understand that they are also part of his world.Allow him to spend few weekends or occasional night out parties with his friends.But at the same time make sure that u get u r due importance! It must not be tht he roams arnd with his friends forgetting that you exist at home.

6. Don’t start fighting for silly things.Forgetting bthdays n Anniversaries is not a big mistake. Men are not blessed with 2 GB RAM for storing everything in main memory.If you are very particular abt present gifts n parties on u r bthdays n anniversaries. make sure u remind them well in advance by some means (I know it sounds stupid. But if u are so particular, Do it for u r own good)

7. Take him for your shopping only if he’s interested.If you are going for Window Shopping or for saree purchase,Better go with your friends/go alone.He is better at office/home watching cricket.

8. Give him importance always. Show due care and affection.Tht’ s the only way to win a guy’s mind.

MCP FCS fights are no more valid after marriage.Trying to dominate will lead to drastic results

Those who are faithful know only the trivial side of love: it is the faithless who know love’s tragedies.” Oscar Wilde