I love this and I absolutely had to share it with you. Its so simple and yet so true

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
How to live alone… Even if she doesn’t like it…

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE…
Enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to…

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
Something perfect to wear if the employer, or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour…

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
A youth she’s content to leave behind….

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
A past juicy enough that she’s looking forward to retelling it in her old age….
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A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
One friend who always makes her laugh… And one who lets her cry..

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
A feeling of control over her destiny…

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
How to fall in love without losing herself..

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
How to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend without ruining the friendship.. .

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
That she can’t change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents..

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
That her childhood may not have been perfect…but its over…

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
What she would and wouldn’t do for love or more…

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW..
Whom she can trust, whom she can’t, and why she shouldn’t take it personally.. .

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
Where to go… Be it to her best friend’s kitchen table… Or a charming inn in the woods… When her soul needs soothing…
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EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
What she can and can’t accomplish in a day… A month…and a year…

Once there was a little island country. The land of this country was the tiny island itself. The total money in circulation was 2 dollars as there were only two pieces of 1 dollar coins circulating around.

1) There were 3 citizens living on this island country. A owned the land. B and C each owned 1 dollar.

2) B decided to purchase the land from A for 1 dollar. So, now A and C own 1 dollar each while B owned a piece of land that is worth 1 dollar.

* The net asset of the country now = 3 dollars.

3) Now C thought that since there is only one piece of land in the country, and land is non producible asset, its value must definitely go up. So, he borrowed 1 dollar from A, and together with his own 1 dollar, he bought the land from B for 2 dollars.

*A has a loan to C of 1 dollar, so his net asset is 1 dollar.
* B sold his land and got 2 dollars, so his net asset is 2 dollars.
* C owned the piece of land worth 2 dollars but with his 1 dollar debt to A, his net residual asset is 1 dollar.
* Thus, the net asset of the country = 4 dollars.

4) A saw that the land he once owned has risen in value. He regretted having sold it. Luckily, he has a 1 dollar loan to C. He then borrowed 2 dollars from B and acquired the land back from C for 3 dollars. The payment is by 2 dollars cash (which he borrowed) and cancellation of the 1 dollar loan to C. As a result, A now owned a piece of land that is worth 3 dollars. But since he owed B 2 dollars, his net asset is 1 dollar.

* B loaned 2 dollars to A. So his net asset is 2 dollars.
* C now has the 2 coins. His net asset is also 2 dollars.
* The net asset of the country = 5 dollars. A bubble is building up.

(5) B saw that the value of land kept rising. He also wanted to own the land. So he bought the land from A for 4 dollars. The payment is by borrowing 2 dollars from C, and cancellation of his 2 dollars loan to A.

* As a result, A has got his debt cleared and he got the 2 coins. His net asset is 2 dollars.
* B owned a piece of land that is worth 4 dollars, but since he has a debt of 2 dollars with C, his net Asset is 2 dollars.
* C loaned 2 dollars to B, so his net asset is 2 dollars.

* The net asset of the country = 6 dollars; even though, the country has only one piece of land and 2 Dollars in circulation.

(6) Everybody has made money and everybody felt happy and prosperous.

(7) One day an evil wind blew, and an evil thought came to C’s mind. “Hey, what if the land price stop going up, how could B repay my loan. There is only 2 dollars in circulation, and, I think after all the land that B owns is worth at most only 1 dollar, and no more.”

(8) A also thought the same way.

(9) Nobody wanted to buy land anymore.

* So, in the end, A owns the 2 dollar coins, his net asset is 2 dollars.
* B owed C 2 dollars and the land he owned which he thought worth 4 dollars is now 1 dollar. So his net asset is only 1 dollar.
* C has a loan of 2 dollars to B. But it is a bad debt. Although his net asset is still 2 dollars, his Heart is palpitating.
* The net asset of the country = 3 dollars again.
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A
is for Arteries.
You know, the things that your ex-girlfriend ripped out because she really didn’t care for you you twit she was only after your money and could have given a ~Censored~ about you.

B
is for Bitter. Who, me?? No way. I really hope things between them do work out. I hope they get married and have 2 children that are little devils and her hips get huge and his eyebrows finally grow completely together and they get fat and old together and then DIE!!

C
is for Call ya later. She won’t. She never has before.

D
is for Dumped. Does D need to be explained?

E
is for Eating like a pig. Remember when you took her out and she said “I’m not hungry” so you figured you could take her to a nice place because you were able to afford a nice meal at this fine restaurant. Then she ate more than your Uncle Roy (you remember Uncle Roy the one with the mustard stains on everything). So you flip the bill and are broke for the next two weeks and she wonders why you were unable to call her that week and go see movies.

F
is for Friends. That is what she just wants to be. As if you can even stand to look at her.

G
is for Gun. And yes there is a waiting period.

H
is for Horny. Remember when she looked nice and even had a personality? Well, you figure it out.

I
stands for I still hate her. Odds are I always will, unless she calls me and offers me favors.

J
stands for Jim. This is her new boyfriend. Doesn’t Jim have a nice car ? Doesn’t Jim have a good job? Why does Jim want to date her? I think Jim could do much better. I hate Jim. Jim is my mortal enemy.

K
stands for Kill.

L
is for Love. It’s a great euphoric feeling that exists between two people and is shared upon by both parties.

L
is also for Lunatic. Lunatics are crazy. Lunatics are the last people that actually believe in love.

M
stands for Mephistophiles. That is who she worked for.

N
stands for Necropheliac. She didn’t move very much, did she?

O
is for On top. When on top she has another O word.

P
is for Pill. She said she was on it. She lied. She is now sueing you for a few hundred bucks a month.

Q
is for Quitter. She couldn’t last.

R
is for Rich little ***. She bought my love but I paid for it.

S
stands for Suffer. That’s what she made me do.

T
is for torture. Torture is what she did. She tortured you with the truth. She also tortured you with lies.

U
is for Understatement. Saying you hate that ~Censored~ is an understatement.

V
is for Voluptuous. That is the primamry reason you were dating her in the first place.

W
stands for Whine. She was a pro at this.

X
is for Xylophone. Because X is always for xylophone.

Y
stands for You suck! Remember when she yelled that at you.

Z
stands for ZIPPER. This is what you got your hair stuck in while trying to get dressed too quickly while she yelled “QUICK! They’re home!”

What to say to a telemarketer! One of the things that has always bugged me (and I’m sure it has most of you, too) is to sit down to dinner only to be interrupted by a phone call from a telemarketer. I decided, on one such occasion, to try to be as irritating to them as they were to me. The call was from AT&T, and it went something like this:

Me: Hello

AT&T: Hello, this is AT&T….

Me: Is this AT&T?

AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T….

Me: This is AT&T?

AT&T: Yes. This is AT&T….

Me: Is this AT&T?

AT&T: YES! This is AT&T. May I speak to Mr. Salem please?

Me: May I ask who is calling?

AT&T: This is AT&T.

Me: OK, hold on.

At this point, I put the phone down for a solid 5 minutes thinking that, surely, this person would have hung up the phone. I ate my salad. Much to my surprise, when I picked up the receiver, she was still waiting.

Me: Hello?

AT&T: Is this Mr. Salem?

Me: May I ask who is calling please?

AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T….

Me: Is this AT&T?

AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T….

Me: This is AT&T?

AT&T: Yes, is this Mr. Salem?

Me: Yes, is this AT&T?

AT&T: Yes, sir.

Me: The phone company?

AT&T: Yes, sir.

Me: I thought you said this was AT&T.

AT&T: Yes, sir, we are a phone company.

Me: I already have a phone.

AT&T: We aren’t selling phones today, Mr. Salem.

Me: Well, whatever it is, I’m really not interested, but thanks for calling.

When you are not interested in something, I don’t think you can express yourself any plainer than by saying “I’m really not interested”, but this lady was persistent.

AT&T: Mr. Salem, we would like to offer you 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.

Now, I am sure she meant she was offering a “rate” of 10 cents a minute, but she at no time used the word “rate”. I could clearly see that it was time to whip out the trusty old calculator and do a little ciphering.

Me: Now, that’s 10 cents a minute 24 hours a day? AT&T: (getting a little excited at this point by my interest) Yes, sir, that’s right! 24 hours a day!

Me: 7 days a week?

AT&T: That’s right.

Me: 365 days a year?

AT&T: Yes, sir.

Me: I am definitely interested in that! Wow!! That’s amazing!! AT&T: We think so!

Me: That’s quite a sum of money!

AT&T: Yes, sir, it’s amazing how it adds up.

Me: OK, so will you send me checks weekly, monthly or just one big one at the end of the year for the full $52,560? If you send an annual heck, can I get a

cash advance?

AT&T: Excuse me?

Me: You know, the 10 cents a minute.

AT&T: What are you talking about?

Me: You said you’d give me 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. That comes to $144 per day, $1,008 per week and $52,560 per year. I’m just interested in knowing how you will be making payment.

AT&T: Oh no, sir, I didn’t mean we’d be paying you. You pay us 10 cents a minute.

Me: Wait a minute here! Didn’t you say you’d give me 10 cents a minute? Are you sure this is AT&T?
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ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need.

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who finds such a man.

HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED:
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, “You’re next.”
They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

A man is dating 3 women and wants to decide which to marry.

He decides to give them a test. He gives each woman a present of $5000 and watches to see what they do with the money.

The first does a total makeover. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, and dresses up very nicely for the man.
She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much.

The man is impressed.

The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of STRONG golf clubs, some
new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much.

Again, the man is impressed.

The third invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5000. She gives him
back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account.. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much.
Obviously, the man was impressed.

The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money.

Guess which lady he chose to marry?

> > > > > (click following link to get answer)
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# More of our fantasies are about money… than sex.

# If we could have any luxury in the world (and money didn’t matter) more of us would choose to spend money on a butler and a maid than anything else.

# 90% of Americans who own pets buy them Christmas gifts.

# Money is the leading cause of disagreements in marriages.

# 65% of Americans would live on a deserted island all by themselves for an entire year for $1,000,000.

# For $10,000,000 most of us would do almost ANYTHING! Including abandoning our family and friends and our church. A very high percentage of us would, for that same amount of money, change our race or sex. And, 1 in every 14, would even murder someone for ten million bucks.

What’s really strange about this is, the statistics remain the same whether it’s ten million dollars all the way down to three million. For three million bucks, most of us would do the same horrible things we would do for ten million. But, guess what? Few of us would do these things for a “measly” two million.

# 92% of us would rather be rich than find the love of our lives.

# Here’s a weighty one: Money (or the lack thereof) is the biggest stress inducer in the lives of Americans. We worry more about money than our marriages, our health, or even who’s going to win the Superbowl Game or come out on top in the latest Survivor TV show.

# If you get your money out of a Hitachi ATM machine in Japan, it will be laundered. The way they do it is, they briefly press the bills between rollers at high enough temperatures to kill most bacteria.

# Women have very fixed ideas on how much they are willing to spend on a bra. 38.3% of women won’t spend $30 for a bra. 28.4% won’t spend $50. 10% would pay as much as $75. And, only 3.5% would shell out $100. But, you know what? Almost 20% of women say they would pay almost anything for a bra. This is because they consider (and I guess so do a few men) that the contents of what those bras are encasing is of extremely high-value.

# Nearly half of the people who sell their houses with furniture included will take all the light bulbs out of all the lamps when they vacate the premises.

# Most people won’t bend over to pick up money lying on the sidewalk unless it’s at least a dollar.

# Most Americans think pennies are a pain in the ass and the U.S. Mint should stop making them.

# There is about 405 billion dollars in circulation. Only 32 million of that amount is counterfeit. That means, the percentage of counterfeit money in America is .0079%. And, $20 bills are more often counterfeited than $100 bills.

# Do people care if their bills are crisp? Indeed, they do. Fresh, crisp, clean bills are considered much more valuable than those which are old, wrinkled and dirty.

I once sent a ‘dollar bill thank you’ letter to a guy who sent a sincere letter back to me ~censored~ the free $1 bill I sent him was wrinkled instead of crisp as I had described in the letter.

# Let’s flip a coin and try to guess whether it will come up heads or tails. Three times as many people guess ‘heads’ than ‘tails’.

# Here’s one I personally think really sucks: One out of every four Americans believe their best chance of getting rich is by playing the lottery.

# How about this one for a shocking fact: 5% of lottery ticket buyers buy 51% of all tickets sold. (Trust me, none of these people belong to the “Einsteins of America Society”.)

# A staggering 74% of us are influenced by how much we can win in a lottery as opposed to the odds of us winning.

# That’s a good thing for the Government because the odds of winning a lottery jackpot are about 10 million to 1.

# A person who drives 10 miles to buy a lottery ticket is 3 times more likely to be killed in a car accident while driving to buy the ticket… than… he is to win the jackpot.

# Sunday newspaper coupon inserts are the second-most read section of the paper, after the front page.

# Few people know it but, you can buy single-disease insurance.

# Only 6% of people in America regularly buy clothes tailor made just for them.

# Here’s one that’s really important: 63% of us decide NOT to buy a product advertised on the Internet… because… we think the shipping and handling charges add too much to the order.

# Eight times as many Americans would rather use an ATM than deal with a real live teller.

# This one’s going to blow your mind: 83% of Americans still pay with checks instead of credit cards!

# Almost 30% of us say we would need 3 million smackaroos to feel rich. This ties in with the fact most of us would do anything for as little as $3 million… but… not nearly as many of us would do those identical things for a measly $2 million. (Hey, here’s your chance to take advantage of that situation. If you only want to pay $2 million to have something done, ask me if I’ll do it. The chances are, believe it or not, I WILL DO IT.)
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You can have back pain, or you can stop it. The best way to make sure your back pain stays with you is to assume that only a doctor can stop it. The best way to make sure you have no back pain is to understand that only you can stop it.

Why Choose Back Massagers?

Getting a good body massage from a professional takes time and a lot of money. Who has the money to spend on expensive massages at spas or gyms? Not to mention the travel time for those appointments. A portable back massager is easy, inexpensive, and can be used anytime in the comfort of your home.

Bad Position Can Lead to Back Pain

Posture is on of the things that most people neglect checking whether they are sitting, walking or by just mere standing. The posture has been said to be the window of a person and the way he carries himself could determine if there is a problem with a person’s spine or nervous system.

1: The stuff you use when all your credit cards are maxed-out.

2: They say that money isn’t everything, and that’s true. Problem is — look how many things it is though.

3: They say money can’t buy friends. It can, however, rent a few now and then.

4: They also say that money can’t buy you true love either. It does however put ya in a good bargaining position.

5: As for money buying happiness, do you really think the guy with 250 million is any happier than a guy with only 200 million?

6: When money talks, nobody notices what grammar it uses.

7: I’ve got enough money saved for the rest of my life. Well… unless I want to buy something.

8: Double your money! Fold over once and put it in your pocket.

9: A Penny Saved Is… “Not Much”

10: They say that money talks. Mine always says “Good bye!”

11: Money is the root of all money!

I met money one day. I said, “You are just a piece of paper.”

Money smiled and said, “Of course I’m a piece of paper, but I haven’t seen a dustbin yet, in my life” .