1. Never put yourself last.

2. When you extend a helping hand to one person, be careful not to kick someone else in the teeth.

3. Always own a pair of old, faded jeans.

4. Count your blessings every day.

5. Acknowledge your successes along with your downfalls.

6. Burn the candle that has been in storage for the last two years.

7. Strive for progress, not perfection.

8. Remember, the voice telling you that you cannot do something is
always lying.

9. At least once a day sit and do nothing.

10. Don’t close your heart so tightly against life’s pain that you shut out life’s blessings.

11. Celebrate all your birthdays no matter how old you get.

12. Examine your life for limitations and ask yourself why you put them there.

13. Plant a tree, pull weeds, or get your hands dirty.

14. Diminish your wants instead of increasing your needs.

15. Cry when you feel like it.

16. Rejoice in other people’s triumphs.

17. Don’t wait for someone else to laugh or express joy.

18. Forgive yourself for any mistake you make, no matter how big or small.

19. Keep good company.

20. Never take a pill for a pain you need to feel.

21. Use your enthusiasm to put yourself in forward gear and give yourself a spark to move ahead.

22. Look in the eyes of the ones you love when you are talking to them.

23. Remember that one is a whole number.

24. Walk in a summer rain shower without an umbrella.

25. Do a kind deed for someone else.

26. Keep your eyes and ears open to get the messages you need from people and events in your daily life.

27. Be patient.

28. Eat something green.

29. Change what you can and leave the rest alone.

30. Walk hand and hand with truth.
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1. Fission shmission, relax, I’ll increase the water level after my coffee break.

2. Was that “Open valve A and close valve B” or was it the other way round?

3. This whole plant will be running under Win95 tomorrow.

4. HEY! Is smoke coming out of the core normal?

5. Who forgot to pay the water bill?

6. We got 12 seconds to WHAT????

7. Meet your new plant superintendent: Bozo the Clown.

8. A leak? Can’t you fix it with duct tape or something?

9. Oh yeah! 50 bucks says I can make it blow.

10. It’s Russian technology.

11. Move over Three Mile Island – here we come !!!

12. Sniff, sniff…. you smell that?

13. I used to work at Chernobyl.

14. All the way to the RIGHT, not LEFT you dummy!

15. It’s your turn to wax the core.

16. How come all the big shots are leaving?

17. Is that a 60 minute film crew out there?

18. Is this part really necessary?

19. OF COURSE I went to high school. Didn’t finish it, though.

20. Look at the good news: we are going to find out whether people actually glow in the dark.

George Bernard Shaw said, “People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don’t believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can’t find them, they make them.

Sheikspear said, “Circumstances never change we change”

Well, it’s pretty apparent, isn’t it? And every person who discovered this believed (for a while) that he was the first one to work it out. We become what we think about.

Conversely, the person who has no goal, who doesn’t know where he’s going, and whose thoughts must therefore be thoughts of confusion, anxiety and worry – his life becomes one of frustration, fear, anxiety and worry. And if he thinks about nothing… he becomes nothing.

How does it work? Why do we become what we think about? Well, I’ll tell you how it works, as far as we know. To do this, I want to tell you about a situation that parallels the human mind.
Suppose a farmer has some land, and it’s good, fertile land. The land gives the farmer a choice; he may plant in that land whatever he chooses. The land doesn’t care. It’s up to the farmer to make the decision.

We’re comparing the human mind with the land because the mind, like the land, doesn’t care what you plant in it. It will return what you plant, but it doesn’t care what you plant.

Now, let’s say that the farmer has two seeds in his hand- one is a seed of corn, the other is nightshade, a deadly poison. He digs two little holes in the earth and he plants both seeds-one corn, the other nightshade. He covers up the holes, waters and takes care of the land…and what will happen? Invariably, the land will return what was planted.

As we all know, “As you sow, so shall you reap.”
Remember the land doesn’t care. It will return poison in just as wonderful abundance as it will corn. So up come the two plants – one corn, one poison.

The human mind is far more fertile, far more incredible and mysterious than the land, but it works the same way. It doesn’t care what we plant…success. ..or failure. A concrete, worthwhile goal…or confusion, misunderstanding, fear, anxiety and so on. But what we plant it must return to us.

U see, the human mind is the last great unexplored continent on earth. It contains riches beyond our wildest dreams. It will return anything we want to plant.